Is your job driving you crazy?
Do the kids have you tearing your hair out?
Are you feeling on the verge of "losing it"?
If you answer "yes" to even one of these questions, then you're probably struggling with too much stress. Fighting against the stress will probably make it worse. You can probably feel stress from what happened in the past, from what's going on right now, or from what you fear in the future.
Life is always changing. "Can I meet all those new demands I will face?" Change causes stress, even when the changes are positive – like when you find a better job. Your goal should not be to completely eliminate stress. Life would be incredibly dull without any stress.
You Are Not Alone
Everybody lives with stress, although some people have more difficulty coping with it than others. Because life is always changing, and you can't stop the change, it is in your best interest to learn how to accept and embrace the flow of change in your life.
Impossible? Not really.
For the most part, the world will not end if you miss a deadline, burn supper, or have a flat tire on the freeway! Stress comes from within. And the level of stress is determined by how you respond to a situation, not from the situation itself. Since everyone responds in his or her own way, what is stressful to you – such as speaking to a large audience or climbing a mountain – might be stimulating and exciting to someone else.
According to the American Psychological Association:
- 43 percent of all adults suffer adverse health effects from stress.
- More than 75 percent of all physician office visits are for stress-related complaints.
- Stress is linked to heart disease, cancer, lung ailments, accidents, cirrhosis of the liver, and suicide.
But you know that stress isn't all bad. Some stress is necessary to keep you alive and functioning. Stress can motivate you to do a little better, meet deadlines, or solve problems. Too much stress, however, can reduce your efficiency, lead to illness, or make you feel like giving up.
Identify Your Stressors
What sends your stress level through the ceiling? Is it crying kids, work deadlines, finances, loneliness, or one of a thousand other causes? Take some time to identify the most serious stressors in your life. Write them down. Now you are in a position to do something about them. Some stressors are beyond your direct control, such as world hunger, pollution, and high prices. Tell yourself that you will learn to accept the realities you can't change and focus on the stressors you know you can influence. Most stressors, with some planning, can be managed. Manageable stress often comes from on-the-job conflicts, monthly bill paying, or finding enough quality family time.
When Stress Becomes Overwhelming
When stress becomes so strong that you feel trapped, can't concentrate, don't sleep soundly, can't get along with your significant others, become unproductive on the job, or just find it difficult to make it through the day, get professional help for yourself or your whole family. Ask your doctor for a referral. The longer you wait, the more destructive the stress can become.
What Can You Do?
Be creative. Take a look at this list. It might give you ideas of your own.
- Learn to say no and mean it. Practice different ways to set limits and not take on too much.
- Choose a healthy diet. Good health choices will pay off.
- Minimize your intake of alcohol, nicotine, and caffeine. People under stress often increase their use of unhealthy substances.
- Learn and use relaxation techniques. Try yoga, tai chi, meditation, prayer, or other proven methods.
- Be physically active every day. Activity, such as a brisk walk, will reduce stress.
- Have fun every day. Schedule time for enjoyment. It's good for you!
- Maintain a regular routine. Having a regular schedule provides a framework for facing life's challenges.
- Share your feelings with someone you trust.
- Consciously slow yourself down when your stress speeds up.
- Take a relaxation break every few hours. Just a few minutes can make a difference.
- Get enough sleep. Seven to eight hours is about right for most people. Working longer and sleeping less will undermine your health.
- Help someone else. They will feel better and so will you.
- Look for practical solutions to stressful situations instead of giving up and feeling helpless.
- Get help before the problem becomes a crisis. Don't put it off.
- Look at change as a positive force. Believe that your life will just get better.
- Tell yourself that you are OK. A positive self-concept is a great stress reducer.
- Don't dwell on what you can't control or change. Focus on those things you can change.
- Take charge of your life. Make decisions, act on them, and take responsibility for the results.
Take Care of Yourself
You are the only one who can understand and manage the stress in your life. That doesn't mean you should do it all by yourself. Help from others can make you a better stress manager. Make a plan, expect it to work, and look for the good things in life. Take the time to manage the stressors you have identified. If you don't get results and feel more in control after a few weeks, talk to a friend, your doctor, a professional therapist, or your religious advisor. Most stress can be managed, and you're the one to do it. |
