Men Get Depressed Too
About six million men in the United States show clinical signs of depression, according to estimates by the National Institute of Mental Health. The number who are actually diagnosed and treated is far, far smaller. Men, in general, are reluctant to see a physician for routine healthcare and even more reluctant when the problem could be an "emotional" one, studies have shown.
"Most people with a depressive illness do not seek treatment, although the great majority — even those whose depression is extremely severe — can be helped," according to a National Institute of Mental Health publication on depression. "Thanks to years of fruitful research, there are now mediations and psychosocial therapies such as cognitive/behavioral, 'talk,' or interpersonal that ease the pain of depression.
"A depressive disorder is not the same as a passing blue mood. It is not a sign of personal weakness or a condition that can be willed or wished away. People with a depressive illness cannot merely 'pull themselves together' and get better. Without treatment, symptoms can last for weeks, months, or years."
In nearly all cases of depression, treatment can help.
Symptoms of Depression in Men
The actual symptoms of depression are similar in both men and women.
- Persistent sad, anxious, or 'empty' mood
- Feelings of hopelessness or pessimism
- Feelings of guilt, worthlessness, or helplessness
- Loss of interest or pleasure in activities that were once enjoyed, including sex
- Decreased energy or fatigue
- Difficulty concentrating, remembering, or making decisions
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- Insomnia or oversleeping
- Loss of appetite and weight loss or overeating and weight gain
- Thoughts of death or suicide — suicide attempts
- Restlessness or irritability
- Physical symptoms such as stomach problems, headaches, or chronic pain that doesn't respond to treatment
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The Differences in Response to Depression
The behaviors that result from these symptoms are often quite different.
- Depression in women is often associated with hormonal changes, feelings of hopelessness, and stress associated with childbirth and child rearing. But depressed women are unlikely to be violent, except toward themselves.
- Men suffering from depression are four times more likely than women to commit suicide. More women attempt suicide, but many more men succeed. The rate of suicide in men increases with age and peaks after age 85.
- Men's depression is often associated with excessive alcohol or drug use.
- Men's depression may result in working long hours and avoiding family and friends.
- Anger, irritability, blame, and lashing out are common emotions for depressed men.
- Depression in men is associated with increased risk of coronary heart disease.
- Men tend to see depression as a "women's disease" and may deny their obvious symptoms.
Recommendations
Men, see a doctor when you recognize the symptoms of depression — your life may depend on it. If your wife, parent, or friend is concerned about changes in your actions, emotions, and attitude, see a doctor. If you are lashing out at your children or drinking too much, see a doctor. If you are having suicidal thoughts, even in passing, see a doctor.
- A doctor's examination can help determine whether the symptoms are depression or another illness, such as a viral infection. Calmly discuss the options.
- Treatment can include antidepressant medication and/or psychotherapy. A combination of both types of treatment is often most effective. Antidepressant drugs are not habit forming.
- Follow both the medication and therapy recommendations made by your doctor and therapist. Progress can be lost if you stop treatment too soon.
Help Yourself
There are some things you can choose to do to help yourself cope with depression. Don't expect miracles, but every little bit of normality and improvement helps.
- Set realistic goals for yourself and take responsibility for your actions.
- Break large tasks into a series of small ones. Set priorities. You can only do what you can do, and no more.
- Spend time with people who are important to you. Confide and share.
- Take part in activities that you enjoy — being physically active helps you cope with depression.
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- Expect your mood and feelings to get better — over time.
- Postpone important decisions, if possible. Once you feel better, you might make a different choice than when you were depressed.
- Positive thinking — looking for what will work — is much preferable to seeing everything as negative.
- Let your loved ones help you — although that can be difficult for men to do.
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