Whether you’re looking at a long-term commitment or just a “one-night stand,” be aware that any sexual contact – not just sexual intercourse – increases your vulnerability to infection. Before you engage in any act of intimacy, discuss your feelings and expectations. And by all means, discuss sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) and how you’ll protect each other from them.
What’s An STD?
Many viruses – including the flu, mononucleosis, and hepatitis b – can be transmitted sexually. And STDs can be transmitted in various ways. Your partner might not realize that STDs can be spread not only by vaginal intercourse, but also by anal or oral sex and even sex play without intercourse.
More than 25 diseases are spread primarily through sexual activity. Here’s a listing of common STDs, and the ways they can be transmitted:
| Chlamydia/Nongonococcal Urethritis (NGU) |
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Anal and Vaginal Sex |
| Gonorrhea |
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Anal, Oral, and Vaginal Sex |
| Syphilis |
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Anal, Oral, and Vaginal Sex |
| Herpes |
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Anal, Oral, Vaginal Sex, Sex Play (Contact with Body Fluids), Skin-to-Skin Contact |
| Human Papillomavirus (HPV)/Genital Warts |
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Anal and Vaginal Sex, Skin-to-Skin Contact |
| Hepatitis B |
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Anal, Oral, Vaginal Sex, Sex Play (Contact with Body Fluids), Contact with Blood |
| HIV/AIDS |
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Anal, Oral, Vaginal Sex, Sex Play (Contact with Body Fluids), Contact with Blood |
| Trichomoniasis |
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Anal, Oral, Vaginal Sex, Sex Play (Contact with Body Fluids), Skin-to-Skin Contact, Contact with Infected Surface (such as sheets, towels, or clothes) |
| Chancroid |
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Anal, Oral, Vaginal Sex, Skin-to-Skin Contact |
| Crabs, Scabies, and Pubic Lice |
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Anal, Oral, Vaginal Sex, Skin-to-Skin Contact, Contact with Infected Surface (such as sheets, towels, or clothes) |
| Bacterial Vaginosis |
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Uncertain as to why, but women with a new sex partner or multiple partners are more likely to develop it. |
The Ideal
The ideal for many people is to have sex with only one partner. You don’t need to worry as much about getting STDs if:
- Neither of you has ever had sex with anyone else
- Neither of you has ever shared needles
- Neither of you has ever been infected with an STD
Don’t assume your partner is infection free. If your partner has had previous sexual experience, and has not been tested for an STD, he or she might be a carrier. Some partners might not know they are infected. Others might know but not tell, hoping you won’t become infected.
Some partners might not be honest with you about their sexual or drug use history. One in three people will lie about their feelings to have sex with someone. And one in three people will lie about their sexual history as well. Be honest with your partner, but don’t assume he or she is being honest with you. If you want to be certain that you and your partner are STD-free, go to a clinic together for STD testing.
Condoms, female condoms, and other barriers help protect you from many STDs. Not having oral, anal, or vaginal sex and avoiding any contact with someone’s body fluids is the best way to protect yourself from an STD. It’s possible to get an STD through skin-to-skin contact, or even from sharing towels.
To avoid regrets, talk about your options for intimacy, and about protecting yourself and your partner before engaging in any sexual contact. |
