It seems to be a contradiction: Holidays are supposed to be a time for fun, enjoyment, and love. But they often turn into stressful, dreaded get-togethers. What can you do to make the holidays better for you, your family, and your friends?
I Love Holidays – I Hate Holidays
Many people have mixed emotions about holiday gatherings. And events never happen like they do on TV. What's the matter? Is there something wrong with your family? Probably not.
Every person and every family has doubts and problems. The results seldom equal the expectations.
A Few Simple Ideas
- Be realistic. Don't expect too much. People aren't going to mysteriously change for this particular gathering.
- Set financial limits. If you exchange gifts, set a cost limit. How about exchanging home-made gifts? Or, just give gifts to the kids. An inexpensive "grab bag" can be fun.
- Tell your kids well ahead of time what your financial limits are. "The video games are a maybe, but the pony is a definite no."
- If you're the one responsible for providing the feast, plan ahead. You can prepare many things ahead of time and put them in the freezer or refrigerator. Ask others to bring specific dishes – and be clear about what you want:"Sadie, bring a salad. Mort, please bring the rolls." Make the necessary arrangements for people who have food allergies or other special dietary needs.
- You can save time by shopping early or by shopping online. Hurrying to catch up is always stressful.
- Take time to relax and visit. It doesn't matter if dinner is half-an-hour late. And don't worry if someone gets there an hour late.
- Make time for the grandparents or great-grandparents to tell some of the old stories. Family tradition is important.
- It's not your job to make sure everybody has a good time. Just take care of the basics and let others take care of themselves. However, do provide games and activities for the kids.
- If guests are arriving from far away, make arrangements far ahead of time for lodging and regular meals. You might not have room for everyone to stay with you. A local motel might be a good solution.
- Learn to say "No." You can't do everything, so don't try. Ask for help. Most of the time, others will be happy and pleased to have been asked.
- Be sure to go for a walk, swim, or bike ride to keep physically balanced and reduce stress.
- If you dread the whole holiday hype, just wait and remember that "this too shall pass."
Happy holidays! |
